Every Woman Deserves to Know Her Worth—Through Her Own Eyes
Let’s get one thing straight: the world has been lying to you about your worth since the moment you took your first breath. It’s been feeding you this garbage narrative that your value comes from how others see you—your looks, your productivity, your ability to make everyone around you comfortable. And you’ve probably believed it, because why wouldn’t you? It’s everywhere: in the media, in your family, in your friendships, in every corner of society.
But let me tell you something radical: your worth is not up for debate, and it is absolutely not tied to anyone else's opinion of you.
Here’s the kicker: most women don’t even realize they’ve been brainwashed. We’re out here chasing gold stars—validation from bosses, partners, parents, strangers on the internet—like we’re trying to win a prize for “Most Likable Woman of the Year.” And let’s be honest: the goalposts are always moving. Be nice, but not too nice. Be confident, but not arrogant. Be successful, but not intimidating. Exhausting, isn’t it?
The Lie of External Validation
Let me break this down for you. The entire system of external validation is rigged. It’s designed to keep you small, to keep you compliant, to keep you chasing approval instead of owning your power.
When you rely on others to determine your value, you’re handing them the keys to your self-worth. And spoiler alert: they don’t even know what to do with them. One day you’re the most amazing friend, partner, coworker, or mom. The next, someone’s annoyed you didn’t text back fast enough, or they didn’t like your tone in an email, or you didn’t fulfill some unspoken expectation. And just like that, your “value” drops—because you outsourced it to someone else.
But here’s the truth you’ve probably never heard: your worth isn’t tied to anyone’s opinion of you—not your family’s, not your boss’s, not society’s. It’s inherent. It’s yours. Full stop.
The Revolutionary Act of Self-Validation
So, what does it look like to stop outsourcing your self-worth? It starts with one simple but terrifying truth: you decide what you’re worth. No one else.
I know, I know. That sounds selfish or arrogant, right? That’s just more societal brainwashing. Women are taught to believe that knowing their own value is “too much.” But here’s what’s actually too much: spending your life trying to prove your worth to people who don’t even understand it.
When you decide to see your value through your own eyes, you stop trying to be everything for everyone. You stop wasting energy on people who don’t respect you. You stop making yourself small to make others comfortable. And you start showing up for yourself—fully, unapologetically, and powerfully.
How to Reclaim Your Worth
If you’re ready to take your self-worth back (and you should be, because you deserve nothing less), here are a few ways to start:
Question Everything: Notice when you’re seeking external validation. Ask yourself: Why am I looking for this person’s approval? What am I making their opinion mean about me?
Decide on Purpose: Write down what you want to believe about your worth. Not what you’ve been told to believe—what you want to believe. Then practice it every day, like the life-changing skill it is.
Say No Without Apology: Start setting boundaries like your self-worth depends on it—because it does. Saying no to others is saying yes to yourself.
Celebrate Your Own Damn Self: Stop waiting for someone else to notice your wins. Brag about them to yourself. Make a list of everything you love about you. And remember: you don’t need anyone else to validate it.
Your Worth Is Non-Negotiable
Here’s the bottom line: you are worthy just because you exist. Not because of what you do, how you look, or what anyone else thinks of you. You don’t need permission to believe that. You don’t need proof. You just need to decide that it’s true—and keep deciding it, every single day.
Because when you own your worth—through your own eyes—you stop playing by everyone else’s rules. And that? That’s where real power lies.
You matter to me. Your presence here, reading this—it matters. Thank you for YOU.
Warmly,
Dee
P.S.
Starting this Friday, I’ll be launching my new audio series on women’s empowerment, reclaiming your power, and breaking free from the patterns that keep us small. Think of it as a deep dive into the work we all need—a space where I get to rattle on (in the best way) about what matters most: YOU knowing your worth and stepping fully into your power.
If this resonates with you and you want to support my work, you can upgrade to a paid subscription and get access to the entire series. I promise it’ll be worth it—raw, real, and always from the heart.
But rest assured: this space will always include free posts like this one, never paywalled. Why? Because this work matters to me. Because YOU matter to me. And because I want you to hear, as often as you need to, how wildly important and valuable you are.
Let’s do this together. Your power is waiting for you to claim it.