Good Girls Don’t Change the World
I'll tell you why.
Hello Brave Ones,
Let’s talk about the myth of the "Good Girl." She’s polite, accommodating, and endlessly apologetic. And society loves her for it. But let’s not sugarcoat this: the "Good Girl" is a construct designed to keep women small, compliant, and quiet.
Here’s the truth: good girls don’t change the world. They keep it running for everyone else while burying their own brilliance. And if you’re tired of playing by those rules, this newsletter is your permission slip to rip them up.
Good Girls Don’t Change the World
Let’s dig deeper into this idea of the "Good Girl." She’s the one who always smiles, never argues, puts everyone else first, and knows how to stay in her lane. She’s rewarded for her compliance with compliments like “sweet,” “helpful,” and “easygoing.” Society trains us from a young age to believe that being the "Good Girl" is what makes us valuable, lovable, and accepted.
But let me ask you something: who benefits from this? It’s not you.
Being a "Good Girl" comes with a steep price. It costs you your voice, your boundaries, and your authenticity. It means contorting yourself into what others want you to be instead of who you actually are. It means swallowing your needs, apologizing for your existence, and carrying the weight of everyone else’s comfort while neglecting your own.
And let’s not forget: the world loves a "Good Girl" because she keeps things running smoothly. She doesn’t demand too much. She doesn’t disrupt the status quo. She doesn’t call attention to the cracks in the system because she’s too busy cleaning up everyone else’s mess.
But here’s the truth: compliance isn’t the same as goodness.
Goodness is standing up for yourself and others. Goodness is telling the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. Goodness is honoring your needs and making space for your voice, even if it challenges those around you. Compliance, on the other hand, keeps you small. It asks you to trade your power for approval. And it serves a system that was never designed to empower you.
Let me tell you a little story. I once sat in a meeting where I was the only woman at the table. I had an idea—one I knew was valuable—but I hesitated. I could hear my inner “Good Girl” whispering, Don’t speak up. What if they don’t like it? What if you come across as bossy? And for a moment, I considered staying quiet. But then I caught myself. I thought, No. My voice matters. I spoke up, and guess what? The world didn’t end. In fact, my idea changed the entire direction of the project.
But let me tell you something else: not every moment like that ends with applause. Sometimes, standing up for yourself means being misunderstood. It means being called difficult or demanding. It means losing relationships with people who only liked the version of you they could control. And that’s okay. Those losses are not failures—they’re freedom.
You don’t owe anyone a "Good Girl" version of yourself. You owe yourself the freedom to be who you truly are—bold, boundary-setting, and beautifully imperfect. The world needs more of that. And it needs more of you.
Tools for Transformation
Transformation doesn’t just happen—it’s intentional. Here’s a practical exercise you can use this week to reclaim your power and strengthen your resilience.
The Boundary Reset Ritual
Take three deep breaths, focusing on your center.
Visualize the boundary you need to enforce—whether it’s saying no, asking for space, or holding someone accountable.
Repeat this affirmation aloud: “I honor my needs, my energy, and my voice. This boundary is an act of love—for me and others.”
When the moment comes, hold the line with compassion and clarity.
Every boundary you set is a step closer to the life you want.
Power Playlist
Music has a way of shifting our energy and inspiring action. Here’s this week’s empowering anthem to remind you of your strength.
This Week’s Song: “Unstoppable” by Sia
Why This Song?: Sometimes, you need a reminder that even when life feels tough, you’re tougher. This track is pure fuel for stepping into your power and owning your worth.
What to Expect Next
Next week, we’re diving into the narratives we inherit—those stories about who we’re supposed to be that keep us stuck in cycles of self-doubt and disconnection. We’ll explore how to recognize them, rewrite them, and finally let them go.
For Paid Subscribers:
This week, you’ll find an exclusive Audio Guide in your inbox:
Audio Guide: “Boundaries Aren’t Barriers; They’re Bridges”
In this audio, we’ll explore how boundaries are an act of connection, not rejection. I’ll share practical ways to enforce them and reframe the guilt that so often comes with setting limits.
You’ll also receive this week’s paid subscriber challenge:
Challenge Title: "Catch Yourself Being a Good Girl"
I’ll walk you through a step-by-step practice to spot where compliance is sneaking into your life and show you how to shift into boldness instead.
Unfiltered Moment
This week, I caught myself almost apologizing for taking up space—again. It was something small: someone bumped into me, and the reflexive “sorry” was halfway out of my mouth before I stopped myself. I looked up and said instead, “Oh, excuse me,” because why on earth am I apologizing for being here?
It seems small, but these moments stack up. They remind me—and hopefully you, too—that reclaiming your power isn’t one grand gesture. It’s a hundred small ones. It’s in the pauses, the course corrections, and the permission you give yourself to just be. Imperfect, unapologetic, and absolutely worthy.
In Your Corner, Always
This week, I hope you remember: the world doesn’t need a “Good Girl.” It needs you. Bold, brave, and beautifully yourself. Let’s stop blending in and start standing out. You’re not here to be small—you’re here to be unstoppable.
Let me know how this week’s reflection lands for you. Reply to this email, share your wins, or just say hi. I’m here, cheering you on every step of the way.
Until next time,
Dee
Why Upgrade to Paid?
Brave Ones, the free content in this newsletter is just the beginning. When you upgrade to paid, you unlock an even deeper, more transformative experience designed to support your journey toward empowerment and self-reclamation.
Here’s what you’ll get as a paid subscriber:
Exclusive Audio Guides:
Think of these as personal, intimate conversations where I dive into the heart of each week’s theme. These guides go beyond the newsletter, giving you practical tools, stories, and insights to carry with you. It’s like having a trusted voice in your ear, cheering you on.Actionable Challenges:
Each week, I’ll create a guided challenge exclusively for paid subscribers. These are designed to take the concepts we explore and turn them into real, tangible shifts in your life. It’s not just about learning—it’s about doing.Deeper Connection:
As a paid subscriber, you’ll have access to insights and practices that foster growth on a whole new level. It’s where the real, raw, transformative work happens.Support Your Own Transformation:
By upgrading, you’re investing in yourself—and that’s one of the most empowering decisions you can make.
So, if you’ve been inspired by what you’re reading here, imagine what’s waiting for you behind the paid tier. You’re not just subscribing; you’re stepping into a deeper commitment to your growth, your power, and your worth.
Ready to take the next step? Upgrade today, and let’s make this journey even more transformative—together.
In my teens, I was told "If you have never been called a bitch, you haven't lived." We are only called that when one disagrees with us or we are "out of line." Determine your own line!